decay

Nineteen years ago, with excitement and happy feelings we stepped into this world. We seek for new things, new friends, new teachers, new people, new environment, new love... Nineteen years ago, we can't wait to grow up. Nineteen years later, we finally realize that we could have waited to get older. We finally realize that time somehow has passed away and soon there's the time we have to say goodbye. As we're getting older, we change we grow up. I always thought I've changed since i graduated from high school. Yes I've changed; not moving forward but backward. Immature and childish came back to me together with oversensitive. I'm acting like a little girl. But i could not find back the joyful and happiness that i had when i was little girl. And i can't move forward. I know I've to do my own growing no matter how tall my grandfather was. But growing up is never easy. I hold to things that were while people goes far. I change the way i think because i can't change the changes that i don't like. In the end, i made myself become emotional. I'm not happy. I'm pessimistic. And i don't like it. Push me so that i can move forward. Save me so that i can escape from the dark and cold.